CHAPTER FIVE - HONG'S THEORY (pt. II)

I come to in a long, dark tunnel. It’s windy in here; the wind roars loudly and blows through my hair. There’s a small light at the end, but it’s so far away it only looks like a little dot. I walk towards it, but the wind’s getting stronger and it feels like I’m gonna get blown backwards if I stop walking. I run towards the exit, desperate to get out of this cold, dark, confining place. The wind resistance bogs me down, but I refuse to let that stop me. I run towards that light and let it wash over me endlessly, my eyes instinctually screwing shut due to the sudden brightness. All I can hear is the ringing in my ears and my heart pounding blood through my body.

When finally I open my eyes, I find myself in an open meadow, similar to the starting place in the wonderful dream I’d had countless times before. While I’m certainly happy to have that dream again, I can’t say I’m not disappointed that Anton isn’t here. Oh, well. I guess it’s safe to say my theory has been proven wrong and I really don’t possess dream magic (or at least in the way I thought I did).

I decide to walk around a little bit as long as I’m here, since I don’t think I’ll be waking up any time soon. Not like I’d want to, anyway! I look around as I walk, seeing only the same dense pine forest and snowy mountains that surround this place. From every cloud in the sky to each individual blade of grass below my feet, nothing has changed since the last time I’ve been here, and never will. There’s even a rainbow above the icy peaks– of course, the same exact rainbow that’s always there. All the flowers I carefully tread over are in the exact same spots as they always are, too (at this point, I’ve had this dream enough to know their positions). I pause for a moment to pluck a little daisy from the ground and stick it in my hair, smiling to myself as I continue on.

I walk for some time, just enjoying the calmness of strolling along this rolling sea of green grass and wildflowers, until I see something off in the distance that sends my heart racing.

“Anton…?” I whisper to myself, incredulous. I swear, it’s really him! I run towards him, faster than I ever have in the waking world; so fast time seems to blur all around me. Too fast! I shout at him to move out of the way before promptly stumbling over a stone and somersaulting to his feet quite awkwardly.

“Oof,” I groan, “I totally meant to do that.”

“What the hell…? Hong? What are you doing here?” He stares at me in disbelief for a moment, his expression suddenly souring as he sees the manic smile creeping across my face, “Don’t tell me this means–”

“Hahahaha!!! It worked! It worked!” I cheer, standing back up and dusting myself off, not one bit hurt by my terrible fall, “It really worked!!”

“What on earth are you talking about?! Were you purposely trying to invade my dreams?” Anton asks, frightfully taking a step back from me as I cartwheel countless circles around him, giggling like a lunatic all the while.

I do a final cartwheel around him, then stop, falling to the grass panting and breathless.

“H-Holy shit,” I gasp, catching my breath, “My theory was right… I really do have dream magic!”

Our eyes meet, and I quickly stand back up and sheepishly brush the grass from my hair. I look at the ground awkwardly, realizing that in this dream I’m wearing my Keroppi slippers and the pajamas I went to bed in. I inhale deeply, then look back up to Anton, who is still staring at me.

“I guess I owe you an explanation, huh?”

“Yes. Yes, you do,” Anton replies, unamused and unnerved.

“Well, after we’d talked about dream magic, I came up with a theory to test,” I explain, “I figured that if I thought really hard about you, our dreams would sync up again, so all day I thought about you really hard! And I was even thinking about you lots before I went to bed too…” My voice trails off as Anton’s face turns slightly pink. To his credit, it does sound kinda creepy for me to tell him about that. At this point, I think I’ve said too much.

“F-For the love of all things sacred and profane, please refrain from doing anything like this again,” he stammers, growing more unsettled, “I thought I’d made it abundantly clear I didn’t want you in my dreams. What you’ve done is incredibly disturbing.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be creepy or, like, invade your privacy or whatever,” I say earnestly as I pout and cutely twirl a small section of hair between my fingers, “I just wanted to test out my theory, and now I know for certain it’s true! I really do have dream magic, Anton! I, for one, think you should be excited that I’m learning about my new powers!”

It’s clear my attempts at being charming aren’t fooling Anton any– if anything, they’re only seeming to make him more frustrated.

“Enough. Enough of this,” he mutters, likely having ignored everything I’ve just said, “So troublesome and disrespectful. I make my boundaries clear as day, yet no one seems to respect them. Funny how that is; spent my whole life trying to be someone who commands respect, yet here I stand, an utter failure. Where could I have possibly gone wrong?”

I rush to his side, growing concerned. At first, I couldn't tell if he was just being dramatic or if he was genuinely upset. Now I think it’s safe to say he truly is angry, and things aren’t looking pretty.

“Look, I’m sorry, okay! I won’t do anything like this again! This was just a one-time thing, and it won’t happen again. I’ll leave your dreams alone from now on, I promise!”

“I feel violated, damnit. My mind’s a sacred place, and it’s mine alone. What few dreams I have do not need to be defiled by your irritating presence. Can hardly get a break from you in the waking world,” he replies angrily, carelessly shoving me out of his way, “If dream magic truly is so important to you, you should attend to your own dreams instead of appropriating mine.”

I fall to the ground, hard, as he starts to walk off. I get back up, beginning to feel just as angry as he is as hot, mad tears begin to well up in my eyes.

“Hey!” I shout after him, balling my fists up, “Hey! Where do you think you’re going, you jerk?!”

He stops, turning back towards me and crossing his arms somewhat threateningly. He can try to intimidate me all he wants, but I’m not scared at all. I’ll never be afraid of him.

“Somewhere very far away from you, that’s for certain.”

“You’re crazy! You just pushed me to the ground for no reason! Aren’t you going to say sorry?!”

“It wasn’t for ‘no reason’, you were in my way. And no, I am not going to apologize to you. I don’t think you deserve an apology. Until you learn to respect me, I will not extend such courtesies to you.”

“Respect?! What are you talking about? You think I don’t respect you?!”

“Not in the slightest. It’s obvious you don’t, you’ve already proven as much.”

I grit my teeth and narrow my eyes, my fists trembling because of how tightly they’re clenched. If he hadn’t shoved me, I wouldn’t be nearly this mad. With each passing second, I feel every fiber of my being begin to turn white-hot with pure anger. Me? Disrespectful? Hah! I’m the only person in the entire world right now who even shows him even a MODICUM of respect and he knows it!

“You want respect, huh? I’ll show you some fucking respect!”

I take a few steps closer to him, preparing to punch him in the stomach. Before my fist can make contact with him, he grabs my wrist tightly and forces it away.

“EEEEEYYYAAAHH!!!” I shriek, going into full panic mode as I wrap my other hand around his wrist and (futilely) try to pry his hand off me, “LET ME GO!!!! LET ME GO, YOU WIZARD CREEP!!!”

“You must calm down, Hong, you’re only making things worse!” He’s beginning to panic a bit too as he grabs my other wrist, “There’s no need to resort to violence!”

“BUT THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT AND YOU’RE REALLY FUCKING PISSING ME OFF!!! I CAN’T CALM DOWN! I CAN’T! I WON’T!!!!!” I continue screaming my head off, trying and failing to escape from his vice grip, “I HATE YOU!!!”

Anton’s eyes meet mine for a moment, and they’re full of the deepest concern I’ve ever seen since getting injured. He’d only looked at me like that when I was on the verge of death. I’d almost feel bad for putting him through this if he hadn’t been such a fucking jerk to me only a few seconds ago. I mean, yeah, I guess I’m technically in the wrong here for non-consensually invading his subconscious, but that was just a one-time thing and it’s not like I was gonna even bother him that much or be creepy and weird anyway! And it still doesn’t give him the right to push me!

“Hong, listen to me,” he grits his teeth, “There’s no need for—”

“I HATE YOU!! I AM NOT LISTENING TO YOU!! LET ME GO!!” My voice is growing hoarse from screaming, but I’m still panicking and now those angry, hot tears are rolling down my cheeks. I can’t free myself, no matter how hard I try. Damnit! Why does he have to be so strong?!

“I’m only going to let you go once you’ve stopped crying bloody murder. When you’ve calmed down, we can have a discussion about this like the adults we are and–”

I can barely hear him over my own screaming. Overwhelmed by panic and anger, and still not free, I lean forward and bite his left arm hard as I can in an attempt to regain my freedom. He quickly loses his holding on me, stumbling backwards and clutching his arm tightly.

“FUCK!” He cries in a pained voice that sounds unlike his own, “That HURT, goddamnit!”

I wipe my eyes, blurry from tears, and my heart drops at the sight before me. Even though his clutched-tightly hand is covering the worst parts of the injury, thin streaks of blood are pouring out between his fingers. The feelings of guilt and shame pouring over me are immense.

“I… I didn’t mean to bite you that hard,” I utter softly, wiping blood from my mouth in horror, “I really didn’t mean it.”

He’s bleeding a surprising amount; if only I was wearing my uniform in this dream! I always carry some gauze in one of the jacket pockets in case of emergencies, and I need it now more than ever! Like before, I run to Anton’s side, only this time he doesn’t push me away.

“I’m really sorry. I was just trying to make you let me go, honest! I swear I wasn’t trying to hurt you that bad!”

“Take a look at your wrists,” he mutters, voice low.

Hesitantly, I do as I’m told. Dark reddish-purple bruises have begun to blossom on the skin, shaped like his fingertips. Upon seeing this, I collapse to the ground on my knees, wrapping my arms around my chest in an attempt to make myself small as I can be. Pinned down by my feelings of remorse and humiliation (and the exhaustion of attempting to fight back against someone twice my size), I can’t move. All I can do is continue to cry, my chest heaving and my throat hoarse.

He crouches next to me, but I refuse to acknowledge his presence. I regret everything leading up to this point, truly, I really do. I wish I’d never even had this terrible dream in the first place. I feel him place one of his hands on my shoulder, and I bury my face in my hands.

“I hurt you. Go away,” I sniffle, my voice muffled by my hands.

“Well, I was planning to, but I’m not sure where I would go,” he replies, “Especially with my wounded arm.”

I uncover my face, turning to look at his arm. Red, angry-looking teeth marks mar the paper-white skin on his forearm, and the wound is still bleeding pretty profusely. More profusely than I’d think a normal bite would make it, anyway. I mean, I know I bit him hard, but I swear I didn’t bite him that hard!

“Jesus Christ,” I utter, feeling faint at the sight, “Please don’t hate me. I didn’t mean to–”

“I know you didn’t. I don’t harbor any ill will toward you. We are both equally at fault for this pitiful situation. We can only be angry at ourselves,” he interrupts dryly, wincing in pain for a second, “Although I do believe this entire debacle could have been avoided if you’d respected my boundaries from the get-go.”

“Why are you being so nice to me? I thought you didn’t like disrespectful students like me.”

“You think I’m being nice to you? I’m only being rational. I wouldn’t call that kindness. Why haven’t you punched me like you were planning to? I thought you hated ‘wizard creeps’ such as I. Those were your words, were they not?”

“I don’t hate you, Anton, I didn’t mean it,” I respond, “And I also don’t think you’re a wizard creep, either. If anything, I’m the creep for barging in on your dreams.” And I really am starting to see his point of view. If he’d done the same to me, I think I’d be uncomfortable too. It’s embarrassing to think it took a physical altercation between us for me to figure that out.

“Thank you. That is all I needed to hear,” he replies, almost smugly, before he begins to clutch his arm again, “Fuck, the bleeding doesn’t seem to be letting up.”

“Why don’t you use your fancy healing magic to patch yourself up?” I sniffle again, wiping my nose with the back of my hand.

“I don’t feel like wasting what little magic I have on a wound as superficial as this one. If anything, perhaps I deserve to bleed out for stupidly trying to reckon with someone as stubborn as you.”

“Jeez, don’t talk like that! I usually carry gauze with me, but I don’t have any right now. I’ll have to come up with another way to stop your bleeding.”

I think for a second, and an idea comes to me. I tear off a strip of fabric from the Mr. Bungle t-shirt I’m wearing and grab Anton’s arm, gently tying the fabric around it as a sort-of makeshift tourniquet.

“Ta-daaa~” I smile proudly, the catharsis of having helped him dissolving away any lingering bits of anger left in me.

“Very impressive; I’ve taught you well.”

I want to roll my eyes, but it’s true that he did teach me about tourniquets and how to stop bleeding and stuff a while back. Hell, he’s the reason why I even started carrying gauze with me in the first place!

“Seems you’re redeeming yourself. Can’t say I’m not proud of you, even though you trouble me so terribly,” Anton continues, standing back up, “We are to have a long discussion about boundaries and such once we’re awake again, and I expect you to take at least some accountability for this whole mess. Understood?”

He… said he’s proud of me, I think to myself as I nod, trying to get back on my feet as well; albeit clumsily like a newborn fawn, He almost never says stuff like that… Anton offers me his hand and I grab it with both of my own as he pulls me up. It takes me a second to balance fully, but I eventually find my footing.

“Your wrists are still terribly bruised… I think you deserve an apology, as well. Are you hurt at all? Does it feel–”

“I’m okay, I think we’re even now ‘cos we both got hurt,” I interrupt, “I fucked up and I deserved it. When we wake up, lecture me hard as you want to. I deserve that, too.”

Anton’s face turns pink for the second time in this dream.

“Um, right, I don’t think you need to phrase it quite like that. Actually, let’s not speak of the aforementioned incidents at all until we wake up in the morning; it will only serve as a wedge between us and may lead to future strife. As long as we’re both in this dream-place, why don’t we explore it a bit? I mean, I’ve not had a dream as atmospheric as this one since I was a boy.”

I grin and nod enthusiastically, beginning to feel my energy from earlier come back.

“Yeah, let’s!” I cheer, “This is actually a dream I’ve had quite a bit, so I’m pretty familiar with the landscape and stuff.”

“Really? Interesting I’d wind up here.”

“I was honestly kinda expecting us to wind up in your school dream again, but I’m glad we didn’t. That dream was freaky and weird, and I like this dream way better! And it’s even better than usual because you’re in it!”

“I suppose I’m flattered, but do remember I said we mustn’t talk about these things.”

“Duh, right!” I smack my forehead, “I have to respect your wishes and stuff! Sorry! I won’t talk about dream magic or anything like that ever again!”

“That’s a start…”

Before we can really even decide what to do next, a glittery white thing in the sky overhead catches both of our eyes.

“Did you see that?” Anton asks, looking up.

I nod, looking up as well and tracking it down with my eyes. Upon closer inspection, it’s a rather large dove that seems to be coated in glitter flying directly ahead into the dark thicket that lies a bit ahead of us. Although I’ve had this dream innumerable times, I can’t recall ever seeing a big sparkly bird like this one here before.

“I can’t help but wonder where it’s going. Normally, I would not be this bold, but shall we follow it? Do we really have anywhere better to be?” Anton smirks, nudging my shoulder.

“Gosh, and usually I’m the one taking these kinds of initiatives! That dove is something I’ve never seen before in this dream, and I think it could lead us on a really excellent adventure!”

Anton perks up a bit more.

“Or, it couldn’t. It could totally lead us to some lame bullshit and be a complete waste of our time,” I reply cheekily, “But there’s only one way to find out! Race ya to it!”

And so with that, we begin to chase after it, although Anton’s pace is a bit more leisurely than mine. Funny, as he was the one who wanted to follow it so bad in the first place! But, I suppose it doesn’t really matter how fast we run after it anyway, because it’s big and pure-white and glittery under the bright sun and impossible to lose sight of.